Chad Michael Murray is not ready to return to Tree Hill.
The 41-year-old actor revealed it would be ‘too hard’ to watch A tree hill – the beloved teen drama in which he starred as Lucas Scott – during a panel discussion with his former co-star Bethany Joy Lenz at Christmas con in Edison, New Jersey on Saturday.
“It’s a part of my life that I took away. Lots of development, lots of growth as a human being, and [I] I just deleted a lot of it,” he explained. “I think we have hard drives, don’t we? I’m probably like, you know, when you get an iPhone that’s like 264GB: I’m down on a 32GB phone because of old information, so everything kicks off. So I think I’m scared to death.”
“When you think about where you were in your personal life and the things you went through, the mistakes you made, all those transitions,” she shared. “Watching these things can really bring back all the memories, the embarrassing moments, the things you’re ashamed of, the choices you’ve made that you’re not proud of.”
She continued: “And so, that was so cool. I was really scared, looking back, that this was what I was going to go through, just a relentless barrage of shame from all the stupid bullshit I was going through. have done in my life. Turns out it wasn’t that experience.”
Despite his reluctance to review A tree hillMurray said he was always happy to reunite with his former partners.
“It’s one of those things where it’s a family,” he said. “We grew up together in a lot of ways, and so you walk into a room like this, and I could see Joy, Hilary, or anybody across the room, and it’s like, ‘ Family!’ You can hold on to each other and feel a little safe because they’re your crew.”
A tree hill premiered on the WB in 2003, airing its finale nine years later in 2012. The show originally followed estranged brothers Lucas and Nathan Scott (James Lafferty) in their shared ambitions for basketball greatness and win their father’s affection.
The show was also driven by its female characters, particularly Brooke Davis (Bush), a cheerleader with a fun streak and a heart of gold; Peyton Sawyer (Burton-Morgan), a cheerleader with an artistic eye and an extensive vinyl collection; and Haley James (Lenz), a student tutor who dreams of a music career.
Last month, the cast gathered in Wilmington, North Carolina – where the series was filmed – for the A Week in Tree Hill fan convention.
“It was probably one of the best experiences I’ve had in a long time,” Murray shared with the audience. “It was really nostalgic to get together and see everyone’s faces and then go out and experience it with you.”
In April, Murray spoke about a potential restart of A tree hill during a conversation with New York-based Fox affiliate WNYW.
“You know, I really have no idea,” he said at the time. “I have no idea. There are always discussions. I will say it. There’s always talk.”
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Instead of stepping back into his old character Lucas, Murray had a different idea of how the beloved drama could thrive in a new era.
“I believe there should be a new Hillsides of trees generation,” he said. “I think there are so many issues facing society today that could be addressed on this show.”